Archive for May, 2012

When I think of My Bride

Posted on May 2, 2012 at 10:26 pm, by Ben

When I Think of My Bride by BenBotkin

This is a picture of my precious companion, wife, and best friend, Audri, taken at dusk whilst on board the Branson Belle steamer at Vision Forum’s Titanic 100 event last month. She is the greatest earthly gift I possess.

Over the course of the event we heard stories of brave men who stayed aboard the sinking ship so that their wives and children could live on, and tales of wives and children who would never see their brave husbands and daddies again this side of eternity.

When I hear stories like this I can tend to fret because in my mind’s eye I can see the inevitability of separation from my wife in stark vividness. I can see myself on that ship, embracing my dear Audri for the last time, telling her I love her for the last time, and whispering a verse of encouragement in her ear for the very last time as she, giving her final loving glance at her husband, steps into the lifeboat and disappears over the side.

Now by God’s good grace, I was not aboard the Titanic on the night of April 14, 1912, but that does not negate the fact that there will be a day where one of us will go home to be with the Lord and the other will have to wait here alone: a day will come when Audri and I will be separated by death. A man I greatly respect, R.C. Sproul Jr., had to face this painful reality last year, but he praised the Lord for His blessings and instructed, by Godly example, thousands of husbands to realize that this time will come for them as well.

But it is not here yet.

I’m sure many of us think of the verse “The Lord giveth and the Lord taketh away” only in situations when we’ve lost something, but it’s important to remember that the first part of that verse is as true as the latter! The Lord giveth! Blessed be the name of the Lord! Now is the time where I have my wife in my house, in my arms, at my side, and that is PRECIOUS. Husbands, look at your wives long and hard and be grateful for this day that you have with her – it may be your last.


I wrote this piece of music with the intention of conveying a series of emotions, from gratitude at the tenderness of our union, to the fear of separation, and finally to the blessed assurance and comfort of knowing that we’re held in the Lord’s loving hand. I pray this piece will be a timely reminder and source of encouragement to many.